movies

Thoughts on The Menu (2022)

January 16, 2023 — Leave a comment

I’m not going to call this a review, but I just had to post about this film. I said I was gonna write more about movies this year, after all.

I had to let the movie percolate for a couple of days, and now I’m ready to share my thoughts. (No spoilers, I promise!)

For those of you who don’t know, here’s a short synopsis of the film from IMDb.

“A young couple travels to a remote island to eat at an exclusive restaurant where the chef has prepared a lavish menu, with some shocking surprises.”

When I saw the preview, I was intrigued. I love Ralph Fiennes, first and foremost, and I could easily picture him in the role of a creepy – perhaps murderous – chef. Plus, I had my own assumptions of what the twist would be once the trip went horribly wrong, as it so clearly was going to. Even believing that it was going to be semi-predictable, I still wanted to watch it.

I’ll start by saying up front that my assumption was wrong. I was actually pretty far off. However, and I mean this humbly, my semi-predictable idea would have been better than the reality.

The Menu wasn’t bad, per se, it simply…lacked any excitement. The characters weren’t very likable (except, ironically, the “evil” chef), and it was a story that’s been done before numerous times in numerous settings. There were no shocking moments, or perhaps I’m just immune at this point. It became obvious early on who would survive, and I don’t even want to talk about the absurdity of how that happened.

IMDb categorized The Menu as a “horror, comedy, thriller.” It is none of these things. It wasn’t scary, nor even the least bit creepy. It wasn’t thrilling. And the comedic bits fell flat.

As you can probably tell, I was not impressed. This is one I’m glad I missed in theaters; I would have demanded my money back. Lol.

This isn’t a review, but I would rate this film a 2 out of 5, and the 2 can be attributed only to Fiennes and the performance by Hong Chau, who plays Elsa. It’s watchable, I suppose, so I won’t advise against watching it. However, definitely get it on HBO Max or something.

My Favorite Psychological Horror Movies

October 31, 2022 — Leave a comment

I’m going to start this list with a shout-out to Smile. My friend and I went to see it last Tuesday, and I’ll admit my hopes weren’t very high. Hollywood hasn’t been giving us top-tier horror films lately. However, I really enjoyed Smile. There were a few too many attempts at jump scares – only one of which actually got us – but other than that, it was a solid plot that didn’t get too hokey. I would certainly recommend watching it, at least. Not that I’m promising it will be your new fave! Just…try it.

Split (2016)

One of my favorite movies ever, Split toes the line for me. I’m not sure I’d necessarily call it horror. Kevin is a sympathetic character, which makes it difficult to classify him as evil.

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

American Psycho (2000)

Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

Midsommar (2019)

Cam (2018)

The Invitation (2015)

The Forest (2016)

My Top 10 Favorite Slasher Flicks

October 24, 2022 — Leave a comment

Scream (1996)

Halloween II (1981)

Urban Legend

Cry_Wolf

Trick ‘r Treat

Halloween (1978)

The Final Girls

Terrifier

House of 1000 Corpses

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

My Favorite Found Footage Horror Movies

October 17, 2022 — Leave a comment

Behind slasher flicks like Scream, the found footage subgenre of horror is probably my favorite. Despite its weak start – I was not a fan of The Blair Witch Project, which was the first of these films I remember gaining any traction – this genre has grown into something really fun. So, here are a few found footage movies I would definitely recommend watching.

The Houses October Built (2014)

The Houses October Built 2 (2017)

Hell House LLC (2015)

Hell House LLC II: The Abaddon Hotel (2018)

The Taking of Deborah Logan (2014)

I don’t normally enjoy possession movies, but The Taking of Deborah Logan is legitimately scary.

Unfriended (2014)

Unfriended: Dark Web (2018)

This is the one of the few sequels I liked more than the first.

Death of a Vlogger (2019)

The Lost Footage of Leah Sullivan (2018)

The Den (2013)

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)

I have hated every Paranormal Activity movie – until this one. I was hesitant to watch it, but my BFF and her husband wanted to when I visited last Halloween. And I really enjoyed it.

Three of the Sexiest Dance Scenes in Movie History

April 22, 2022 — Leave a comment

Look, we all know dancing is a means of expressing oneself, right? A lot can be said without a single word being uttered. Dancing can be fun, goofy, romantic, a narrative…but in this case, we’re talking about sex, pure and simple.

You don’t have to bump and grind to get the point across, and these three scenes are proof of that.

1. The ballroom dance in The Labyrinth (1986)

Come up with any detail in these four minutes that isn’t fraught with sexual tension. I’ll wait.

This scene is iconic. I guess you could argue that this is actually supposed to be about romance, but the moment she first spots him from across the room is just…electric. Plus, David Bowie is so swoon-worthy in this role.

2. At the club in Fright Night (1985)

Chris Sarandon is the sexiest, most deliciously evil vampire I’ve ever seen. I’d be drawn to him, too. It was a little strange for me to see Amanda Bearse getting mildly sensual, though, given that I was only familiar with her in “Married With Children” when I first watched this movie. Lol.

3. The wolf dance in Red Riding Hood (2011)

The music – Fever Ray’s “The Wolf” – is really what sells this one. When he looks up at her, knowing she’s jealous, and then the two of them glare daggers at each other throughout the whole dance, it builds a tension that is palpable.

(Feel free to comment with your own additions! These are just the ones that jump out at me, personally.)

Top 5: Vampire Movies

November 5, 2019 — Leave a comment

It is no longer October, but I obsess over horror year-round, so some of my top 5 lists will still feature spooky themes!

Vampires are my favorite fictional monsters. I do appreciate the sex appeal, obviously. Even without it, however, I’ve always preferred the tales that surround vampires over all other creatures that go bump in the night.

These are five of my favorite vampire films. Note that this only includes the non-animated (though I do love Hotel Transylvania). And as always, these are listed in no particular order.

1. Fright Night (1985)

Everything about this movie is great, even Amanda Bearse’s exaggerated transformation near the end. Chris Sarandon is extremely attractive as Jerry Dandridge, but the reason the character is so perfect is his cruelty and IDGAF attitude: he knows how to blend in with humanity and that makes him doubly dangerous.

P.S. – The scene with Jerry and Amy dancing at the club is my favorite part.

2. The Lost Boys (1987)

This iconic film had to be on the list, right? Along with a fantastic plot and an all-star cast, The Lost Boys also had an epic soundtrack. The movie has inspired the generations that followed, resulting in sequels, music videos in which famous scenes are recreated, and several covers of the theme song, Gerard McMahon’s “Cry Little Sister.”

3. Suck (2009)

What do you get when you combine musicians and vampires? A cheesy comedy that is nonetheless extremely watchable. I don’t think you can go wrong with rock stars who are bloodsuckers — with the exception of Queen of the Damned; they screwed that one up — and the addition of Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop make Suck a must-see!

4. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

It’s been a while since I’ve watched this one, but I remember the entertainment value of putting a sassy Valley girl in charge of hunting vampires. I didn’t think the television series recaptured the original charm at all.

5. Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966)

Christopher Lee is the best Dracula. My mom taught me that at a very young age. I actually bought her a collection of Dracula films starring Lee last year for Christmas.

[Trailer] Mandy – 2018

June 30, 2018 — Leave a comment

Nicholas Cage is starring in another action horror film! Mandy is set to be released on September 14, 2018.

Synopsis:

“Pacific Northwest. 1983 AD. Outsiders Red Miller and Mandy Bloom lead a loving and peaceful existence. When their pine-scented haven is savagely destroyed by a cult led by the sadistic Jeremiah Sand, Red is catapulted into a phantasmagoric journey filled with bloody vengeance and laced with fire.“

Trailer:

[Trailer] The Predator – 2018

June 30, 2018 — Leave a comment

The latest Predator is hitting theaters on September 14, 2018. Here is the synopsis, via Wikipedia:

“From the outer reaches of space to the small-town streets of suburbia, the hunt comes home. The universe’s most lethal hunters are stronger, smarter and deadlier than ever before, having genetically upgraded themselves with DNA from other species. When a boy accidentally triggers their return to Earth, only a ragtag crew of ex-soldiers and a disgruntled science teacher can prevent the end of the human race.“

Below is the trailer. I warn you, it’s gonna get bloody!

Slender Man Official Trailer

June 26, 2018 — Leave a comment

Synopsis:

“In a small town in Massachusetts, four high school girls perform a ritual in an attempt to debunk the lore of SLENDER MAN. When one of the girls goes mysteriously missing, they begin to suspect that she is, in fact, HIS latest victim.“

Director: Sylvain White

Release Date: August 24, 2018

[Trailer] Unfriended: Dark Web

June 15, 2018 — Leave a comment

I am so excited about this! I loved Unfriended, and it’s awesome that they’ve done a sequel!

The synopsis, via YouTube:

“A teen comes into possession of a new laptop and soon discovers that the previous owner is not only watching him, but will also do anything to get it back.”

Unfriended: Dark Web will be released on July 20th.